Post by kevna on Sept 14, 2021 13:53:30 GMT -5
The day of Playing to Win
Siorreya - Green Amagetith
When all was said and done, and her duties completed for the day, she escaped Mavros, and found herself and Amagetith in Igen. She had walked restlessly through the glasscraft halls, distractedly waving at those who recognized her. Mostly, people were giving her a wide berth, and she didn’t think as to the reasoning behind it.
Games are supposed to be fun.
Winning is supposed to be fun.
Did you have fun?
Her hands clenched, as she entered the oven room, and feeling the heat lick over and then envelop her skin was a distraction in and of itself. Her whole body warmed, comforted by that very well-known sensation. It was a different heat then the one she had experience this morning, the red hot heat of anger. She avoided the other workers, nodding at the master overseeing the apprentices at work. They all knew her. They still guided her when her work struggled. She had had to re-learn things once she had come back. Two years had been too long, but she had picked it all back up readily enough. She approached an unmanned oven, seeing the melted sand mixture resting in the fires, ready to go. Often, they kept sand melting, you just had to replace it if you ended up using it. She put together the pot to replace it quickly enough, tossing it into the oven, and using gloves and prongs to pull out the ready glass. She placed her metal tools in the fire to that they would be ready to shape when she needed it. Then she got to work.
She lost herself in the monotony of it, the challenge of warping the cooling sand the way she wanted, the struggle of it taking the whole of her mind, a relief. Sweat glided down her temples and nose, her arms and back ached, and she continued on. It wasn’t until she had finished the base of the shape that she recognized what she had made. A vase. It was a simple vase, but in her minds eye she saw her intent, and pulled out smaller tools so she could get to work on the intricate detail. To the fire, then back to the work table she went, keeping the vase hot so her work could continue. Finally, when all was said and done, she stepped back.
The vase held the imprint of a tree, it was the main focus. Other trees could be seen, creating a forest of them along the vase. But she recognized the tree, the focused and larger tree. It was the one she and Podrell had first made love under the first time. Or it closely resembled it. It was the beginning of what they had started, the first play of the game. She watched the vase as it cooled, her mind waking back up again, and her fight with Podrell from that morning plaguing her. It had shaken her. More then she cared to admit.
“So I suppose that’s a win for you. Are you pleased with yourself, daring me to do something there’s no chance I would ever consider?”
The disgust on his face, the derision in his voice was clear as if she had just walked away from him. It had been real. She had constantly been fighting against what she saw in Podrell with what she knew of men, trying to see through his manipulation and lies. He had made her second guess herself and what she saw in him. Second guess if the emotions and words he expressed were real, or part of the façade. But that disgust? It had been real. There was no doubt about it.
“Daring me to do something there’s no chance I would ever consider?”
Was being a dragonrider really such an ignoble way of life to him? That had to be how he had thought about her this whole time; lower, less then him. She really hadn’t known his thoughts, hadn’t discerned any understanding of him with the time they had spent together. Amusement might have been easier to accept, but that disgust. It shook her. Siorreya thought herself so clever, but he had been even more so. She had been foolish and deadglow, for not only had she come to enjoy their time together, but she had allowed him to make her trust him. She had thought him her… friend? No, that wasn’t quite right. It didn’t explain that vexatious feeling he had awakened in her.
The feeling wasn’t anywhere near as distressing now. She had only to think of that disgust on Podrell’s face. Or that cold, empty goodbye that seemed to echo, and the feeling was ripped away, leaving a hollow pit in her stomach, followed by anger, then relief. It was all done, played out, and she on top. The pit in her stomach was just embarrassment, she was sure. Embarrassment at herself. How she had allowed him to make himself such a prominent person in her life. He had done that, hadn’t he? He had often been the one pushing himself into her life, with the way he had interrupted Asirikai and herself, or when she had been sick how he had pushed himself in. She had been right to end their…association. She had even been right to do it in the way she had, for it had revealed him to her.
She only took comfort that she had hidden herself at least in some small part from him. She didn’t have to feel embarrassed that he could suspect her own feelings, that trust and comfort she had derived from him. Her anger, her cruel words, had been a good disguise because they had been all too real. As real as that ‘feeling,’ the feeling that even now she knew would dissipate, even as the glow of heat of the vase faded.
She rubbed her face dry from dripping sweat and turned to go. “Wait, what of the vase Siorreya?” The master stepped before her, motioning behind her. “It is quite the piece, very well done, and beautiful.” White hot anger shot through her when her eyes landed on the vase, a reminder of the game, the beginning of her mistakes. “Sell it.” She brushed past him and left it behind. Her hands clenched as tightly as her jaw, she walked out of the Glasscraft Hall much as she had walked in, with only a few new burns along her arm to show for it. The anger would pass with the flight, and then the relief would step in, and she would go back to Mavros with the intent to live as freely as before, safe behind her walls.
Want to play a game? Siorreya offered her green as she mounted up.
How about a prank? That brought a smile and a chuckle to her lips, banking some of the anger already. Relief already filling her. This was her life, Ama was her only need, and all those strange and confusing feelings Podrell had awoken in her were over. Or at least they were fading. It was just a matter of time. She never had to worry about them again.
Alright… Who should be the target?
I was thinking Rylath. Or Fath. Or music man. Music man referred to Kekoa, and Sio smiled and shook her head.
How about we get all of them? She listened as her happy dragon agreed and began musing about possible options and ideas, her joy infectious. She drowned in that, letting it seep in, cleanse her of all the negative she'd been feeling. Relief and joy. Much better. For now.
