Post by Zen on Mar 23, 2021 14:14:42 GMT -5
Roughly 1 Turn before the start of the Pass
His quarters were a mess. He had thrown and broken things without consideration, taking his anger and frustration out on anything he could get his hands on. Treyjen stood over the table in the middle of his quarters, leaning on it heavily as the haze of red began to fade from his vision. He didn’t know how long he stood there, staring sightlessly down at the wood beneath his hands, until he became aware that he wasn’t alone. His gaze snapped up to Karosh, who was looking at him with some concern, and he snarled, “Well that was a bloody disaster!”
“Aye… it really was,” Karosh replied softly, daring to move a bit closer, “Did y’really expect anything different…? It was our first time….”
“I didn’t expect it t’go that damn poorly! Ferrick and Hassen are dead and Virian lays dying even now!” He grabbed for the nearest object he could reach and threw it against the wall.
“Treyjen….”
“Don’t, Karosh! Don’t… I failed them,” he growled, leaning over the table again, guilt roiling in his belly. They trusted him to lead them well and he had gotten three of them killed today. They may have captured their first ship, taken her supplies, but it was hardly worth three lives. They’d agreed to minimal bloodshed, just take what they needed and let the other ship on its way, but that wasn’t what had happened. The men aboard had been more willing to put up a fight than he had anticipated. None of them had been properly prepared for what had to be done. They had been so damn naive. So the ship hadn’t been allowed to go on its way, no, in his fury he’d had the vessel burned to sink to the bottom of Pern’s seas, taking Ferrick and Hassen with it.
“We all knew the risks, Treyjen-”
“Did we? Because from what I saw, we didn’t have a sharding clue!” he snarled back.
“How could we? It was our first time! We weren’t prepared well enough but-”
“Exactly!” Treyjen ran one hand through his hair, pacing, “We weren’t prepared… at all. And I let it happen anyway! Like a damn fool, I thought….”
“We’re all t’blame for how unprepared we were… it was a harsh lesson, Treyjen, but… we can learn from it,” Karosh stood watching him pace, trying to calm him down.
Treyjen laughed, cold and humorless, “So their lives were a lesson for us then?”
Karosh drew in a long breath and let it out, his voice soft, “Aye… otherwise what was it for?”
That made Treyjen stop his pacing to look at his best friend, and a myriad of emotions played over his face. “Shells, Karosh…. They trusted me. They followed me and supported me and all they got was dead for it! I made the decision to attack that ship!”
“Aye… and we needed those supplies-”
“Not bad enough t’trade three of our own for them!”
Karosh sighed and rubbed a hand over his face, “Virian is still alive….” For now hung in the air between them.
The man was in horrible shape. It had been about all they could do to drag his body back to the Storm’s Eye, because he was still alive and even though looking at him anyone could tell there was no hope he’d survive his wounds, they couldn’t very well leave him behind to die alone. Treyjen cursed and moved past Karosh, “I need t’see him.”
Karosh followed after him, out to the deck where Virian had been laid out, where they’d tried to make him as comfortable as they could, but they didn’t dare move him further. Several men surrounded him, but they moved aside so Treyjen could reach him. Kneeling down beside the man, he grimaced. His breathing sounded… so wrong. Like a wet gargle. Treyjen could only imagine he was drowning in his own blood. They’d initially done their best to apply pressure to his wounds, to stem the bleeding, but it had been so pointless, the blood just wouldn’t stop. They had no healer among them and no way to reach one, and even if they did, he doubted the man’s life was salvageable. It was something of a feat that he was even still hanging on. After a moment of tense quiet, where Virian’s labored breathing seemed to be all that existed in the world, Treyjen pulled a knife from inside his coat and leaned forward, “It’s time t’let go, Virian… leave this suffering behind you.” Ending the man’s pain was the only thing left he could do. It was his horrible mistake that had led to this. It may as well have been his hand that brought him to such a state, so it seemed only fitting that it would be his hand that ended his life properly. He pressed the blade to his throat, there was one more gurgling breath, and then it was over.
Silence stretched out between the gathered men, until Treyjen pushed back to his feet and looked over them all, “If there’s a man among you that wants to turn from back this, speak now!” He waited for the first man to speak, to spit at his feet and curse him for what he’d allowed to happen today. Instead the silence stretched again.
Umbregel took a step forward, his little blue flit settled on his shoulder, “How could we turn back now, captain? What sortsa cowards would we be, t’let three of our brothers die and flee?” There was a soft murmur of agreement from several of the other men.
He looked over them all again, “And you all… you all feel this way?”
“Y’said it wouldn’t be easy, captain. None of us expected it would be,” another man spoke, solemn.
He couldn’t do much of anything for a long moment but meet each man’s eyes, certain some would flinch away, or turn from him, but none did. There was a sort of resolution forming, it was almost tangible. So he raised his voice again, “Then we must ensure this never happens again! Every man will practice fighting with his weapon of choice every sharding day! The next ship we take, we can’t hold back! Mercy is for after we’ve gotten what we want, but until we do, give no quarter! It is our lives or theirs! Is that now abundantly clear!?” The shouts of agreement satisfied him well enough. Karosh was right, as morbid as it was. At least it gave their deaths a purpose. They were a lesson, one none of them would soon forget.~~~
It wasn’t until later in the day that he realized he hadn’t seen his sister since returning. He remembered the look on her face when she’d seen the state Virian was in as he was carted back to the ship, but where had she gone after that? So he set about searching for her and was soon pointed to the wherry’s nest. Climbing up, he found her sitting there and joined her, sitting with their legs dangling over the edge as they had when they were children. “Are you alright?” he spoke softly.
Nalyra didn’t speak right away. There was a glisten of unfallen tears in her eyes when she finally turned to look at him, and a fury he recognized as the same fury he had felt himself, “I’m going with next time.”
He stared at her for a moment before his eyes narrowed, a growl edging into his tone, “You most certainly aren’t.”
“I will NOT sit here and do NOTHING while my family fights and dies!”
Treyjen couldn’t help but flinch, because he still felt the heavy weight of responsibility for the deaths that had occurred today. His tone softened again, “Nalyra… you don’t even know how to fight….”
“Then you had best teach me. Because I’m going with next time, whether you like it or not,” he opened his mouth to speak but she continued before he could, “I’m not a little girl that needs to be protected all the time, Treyjen. If I’m not willing to fight for our freedom then I don’t deserve to be here!”
“Nalyra... you might have to kill someone…,” he spoke hesitantly, because while she made a decent point, and one he could respect, he didn’t like the idea of tainting his sister in such a way. To take a life would be no easy thing. They had done their best to avoid it today and it had cost them dearly. They would not make that mistake again.
She lifted her chin, “I don’t care. I told you I’d pay any price for this and I meant it. After all they’ve done for me… how can I justify not fighting beside them?”
Nalyra felt the responsibility as well, he realized. Perhaps more than she generally let on. It was for her they had fled, after all. For her freedom. Now it had become freedom for them all, but at what cost? He sighed. “You’re right. You ought to know how to fight. Everyone aboard ought to know, whether they’re part of the boarding party or not.”
“I’m going with you-”
“We’ll see,” Treyjen cut her off, giving her a hard look, “I’ll not try to stop you from fighting when you’re ready, Nalyra… but only when you’re ready. We weren’t ready today, and look what happened! If I lost you I….”
Her defiant look softened a little for him, and she leaned into him. He wrapped an arm around her and she sighed, though it was clear she was reluctant when she admitted, “I… suppose that’s fair.” She looked up at him again, “Promise me, Treyjen. This isn’t just an excuse to keep me from fighting.”
He laughed softly, “I promise. It isn’t as though you wouldn’t catch on if it was.”
She bumped him, “That’s right, and don’t forget it either. I’ll come along on my own if I have to. I… I never want to feel this helpless again. I can’t….” Suddenly she turned to him, grabbing at his shirt as she couldn’t hold her tears back anymore, and he held her tightly as she cried against his chest.
He had to do better for her sake too.
