You Can't Stop DNA [Treyjen]

[Zen]

About 2 turns before What's In A Name
Treyjen: 20

Gildira had never made any secret of her attraction to him, and yet she was so set in her traditional holder mentality that it took quite a while before she finally agreed to share a bed with Treyjen. It was something that rather baffled him because she was the one that always sought him out. There were times she seemed to cling to him like a burr whenever he and his family were back in Tillek and he couldn’t seem to shake her. It made it rather difficult to find more… agreeable company. And she scolded him for that too.

Gildira was nice enough, and they’d been friends as children, but the sharding woman couldn’t seem to get the idea of marrying him out of her head. Treyjen knew she wanted to see more of Pern, to be more than a fisher’s wife. She’d said as much. She saw him as a way to do that, but it wasn’t something he particularly appreciated. If she wanted to see more of Pern he thought she should just go out and do it. It wasn’t his duty to carry her along when she refused to put in any of her own effort into getting what she wanted out of life.

So it was some shock when she finally, shyly, invited him to share the night with her. He wasn’t about to turn her down, despite his general growing annoyance with the young woman and her ridiculous, though understandable, infatuation with him. Nor did he turn down any of her future offers, even when she kept up her silly marriage talk. He would always laugh and tell her it was never going to happen, but it didn’t seem to deter her whatsoever.

It had been a few months since their last stop in Tillek and when Treyjen left the Lokarra for the first time upon their return, he was mildly surprised and more than a little exasperated to find Gildira waiting at the docks for him. Couldn’t he just have a few drinks with his friends in peace before she started clinging to him?

Beside him, Karosh snickered, “Looks like your wife’s come t’welcome y’home there Trey.”

Treyjen shot him a glare, snapping, “Shut it, will ya?”

Karosh ducked the cuff aimed at him, stepping away before Treyjen could aim another blow, “Well, if y’can escape her, I’ll meet y’later.”

Treyjen made a displeased noise and headed toward the girl, slipping on the mask of the pleasant trader, “Gildira… t’what do I owe the pleasure?” The forced but passable smile on his face faltered a bit as she looked up at him with some amount of trepidation.

“I… we… can we talk?” she asked him quietly.

“Are we not talking now?” he replied with some amusement, but she didn’t laugh and simply glanced around them.

“Privately?” she added, a strange look in her eye. Treyjen shrugged and let her lead him away to a more secluded location. Gildira hugged herself and took a deep breath, “Treyjen I… I’m….” Her hands slid down to rest lightly over her belly, “I’m… with child. Your child.” She looked up at him then, some sort of hope on her face, beneath the worry.

“... Oh,” Treyjen glanced away, mentally cursing. He could guess where this conversation was about to go.

“You… are you angry?” her voice seemed to grow smaller, wavering slightly.

“No! No, I… I mean…,” he scratched at the back of his head, unsure exactly how to proceed, “What… d’you plan t’do…?”

She blinked up at him, “What do you mean?”

“Well… are… y’gonna keep it?” he glanced back at her warily.

Her eyes grew wide, her arms covering her stomach protectively, “Of course I am! It’s our child! How could you even say that?”

He winced, but he’d expected as much, “Gildira… y’know I’m not gonna marry you, right?”

“You… not even… not even now?” she seemed completely shocked at the admission, even though he’d been telling her as much for months, “Treyjen I’m carrying your child. If we don’t marry then… then….”

He grimaced as he noticed the tears beginning to well in her eyes, “I’ve been telling y’that for months. What in Faranth’s name makes y’think I’d suddenly change my mind now there’s a child involved?”

“Because it’s the right thing to do!” she cried, desperately, “Treyjen I can’t… if we don’t… my family… how am I supposed to live with the shame?”

Treyjen nearly rolled his eyes, but he had a bit more tact than that. “Gildira y’oughtta have known this might happen when we started sharing a bed. If y’were planning all along that I’d marry you if y’got pregnant, that was a shit plan.” Balancing tact and truth was sometimes a difficult thing to do, and feeling now that she had been planning to try to trap him into a marriage with her based on this, he wasn’t entirely inclined to try very hard.

So he wasn’t at all surprised when she started crying in earnest then, “Treyjen… I thought… you… you would….”

“Well, I’m not,” he cut off her explanation of the obvious, his tone going cold and curt. He didn’t appreciate being manipulated, and he wasn’t going to just go along with it. Let the gossips in Tillek say whatever they wanted about him, he didn’t give a shit. He wasn’t going to be forced into something he didn’t want, “I’ll help provide for the child but I’m not going t’marry you.”

“You’re horrible!” she managed to choke out through her sobs before she turned and fled.

Treyjen let her go, not at all inclined to follow and try to calm her down or make her feel better. How dare she call him horrible when she’d been trying to manipulate him. If she wanted to stop acting ridiculous and actually talk about this, she was free to come find him. Until then, he needed a sharding drink.

~~~

When Gildira showed up at his home the next day, he was reluctant to agree when she asked to talk with him again especially as he was nursing a decent hangover from last night, “Are y’going t’scream at me some more?”

She shook her head, looking down at her feet, “I’m sorry… I was just upset…. I still am, but… please, Treyjen….”

His gaze narrowed down at her, “Do y’understand I’m not gonna marry you?”

She glanced up, looked about to cry again, and her gaze fell once more to her feet, “I…. Why… why won’t you-”

“I won’t be tied down. It was your decision t’sleep with me and now it’s your decision to keep the child. You’re not taking my choices away from me,” he growled, “Do y’really think you’re gonna live some happy, children’s story marriage with me by trying t’force me into it? Y’think I’ll suddenly change who I am for someone that manipulated me into something I made very clear I didn’t want?”

There were more tears, but he honestly couldn’t bring himself to care. He couldn’t help but think she was still trying to manipulate him, trying to play on any guilt she thought he might have. He hadn’t forced anything on her, however, and he felt nothing but anger over what she was trying to do. “Treyjen, please… I don’t… I don’t know what to do….”

He didn’t know what to tell her and he was glad to see his mother approaching behind the girl, figuring the older woman might have a better idea how to handle the situation. Jenara, seeing the two of them and the rare serious look on her son’s face, paused, unsure if she should give them privacy. But Treyjen lifted a hand to wave her closer and Gildira turned to see who he was waving at. Jenara hurried her steps when she saw the tears on the girl’s face, “Gildira, what’s wrong?”

“I… I…,” she covered her face with her hands, too ashamed of her current state to admit it to anyone else.

“She’s carrying my child,” Treyjen offered, leaning against the doorframe.

Jenara drew in a sharp breath, then turned a narrowed, disappointed eye to her son, “And you’re just making her stand out here?” She wrapped an arm around the girl’s shoulders and led her inside.

Treyjen rolled his eyes as he stepped aside for them, “She can stay out there if she’s going t’keep demanding I marry her.”

Jenara wasn’t surprised. She had thought perhaps her son would settle eventually, but his reckless and often selfish ways had made it rather clear it wasn’t going to be any time soon, if at all. She frowned over at him as she led Gildira to a chair and sat in front of her, taking the girl’s hands, speaking softly, “What is it you want to do about this?”

She shook her head, “I don’t… I don’t know…. I don’t want to… to… kill our baby….”

“Of course not,” Jenara soothed, giving her hands a light squeeze, “But you have spent enough time with my son to know, my dear… no one can make him do anything he doesn’t want to do. Keeping this child will not make life easy for you, being that you’re unwed. Does your family know?”

Another sob shook her, though she tried to suppress it, and she shook her head, “I can’t… I couldn’t handle the shame… not right now… not when I don’t… I don’t know what… what I’m supposed to do. I thought, I hoped....” She cast a quick look at Treyjen, but was soon staring down at her lap again.

“I’m too hungover for this,” Treyjen growled, and left the two two women alone as he pushed out into daylight. Maybe he’d go back to the Lokarra for a nap and sleep off the worst of his headache. His mother called after him before he closed the door, ignoring her. He was sick of all this sharding marriage shit. It somehow seemed to keep coming back around to it and it was pissing him off.

[Zen]

Later in the day, he was suddenly shaken awake from where he’d been sleeping off his hangover on his father’s ship. He blinked blearily up at his mother’s face and groaned, tried to turn over and go back to sleep. “Go’way…,” he muttered.

“Get up, and come speak with the mother of your child,” Jenara replied, in that tone mothers had that left no room for argument.

Shells but he’d forgotten about that. He threw her a mutinous glare as he pushed himself up slowly, groggy, and rubbed at his face, “Only if there’s no more shellin’ talk’a marriage.”

Jenara sighed, resigned, “We’re quite past that. I think we’ve come up with something everyone can agree on.”

“We…?” Treyjen eyed his mother, “Who all’s ‘we’?”

“Gildira and I, and your brother Rey and his wife,” she explained, “Now come.” She turned so he was made to follow her if he wanted any more of his questions answered.

“Rey…?” What the shell did his brother have to do with any of this? Grumbling, he pushed out of bed and followed his mother, trailing after her at a distance as she led the way to Rey’s home. Gildira, Reyloran, and Wyliva were all there when he entered, waiting for him. He felt immediately defensive and no one had even said anything yet. His brother and his wife were looking at him like he’d done something wrong and he braced himself for some sort of lecture from one or both, prepared to argue, to defend himself. No lecture came, however. Wyliva only leaned over to pat Gildira’s knee softly and Reyloran sighed in resignation, much like his mother had. It seemed they had read it all on his face just as easily as he had read theirs. The argument was over before it began.

“Please, sit Treyjen,” his brother spoke, gesturing to a chair, “We just want t’discuss what we’ve come up with.”

Hesitantly, Treyjen took the offered chair and his mother sat beside him, clearing her throat lightly, “I know Gildira’s parents. They are incredibly traditional. It is very likely… she won’t be allowed to return home after they find out about this.” Treyjen gritted his teeth. What sort of parents would toss their daughter out when she was with child? Jenara continued, “So, Reyloran and Wyliva have graciously offered her a place to stay with them.”

“She and your child will both be welcome here,” Reyloran added softly, meeting his brother’s eyes, “I’ll see them well taken care of while you’re away.”

Treyjen shifted slightly. While he was away? What about when he wasn’t? If this was going to turn back around to marriage, he was leaving.

He was surprised when Gildira spoke next, “I… I still don’t know exactly… just what I want to do…. But Reyloran and Wyliva have offered to let me stay here for as long as I like.” She gave both of them a look full of gratitude before turning to Treyjen, “I… I know… we will never be what I want us to be….” She clasped her hands in her lap and took a deep, shaky breath, “I’m… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be so… horrible to you. You’re right. You told me, over and over, I just….” She trailed off, shook her head, and continued, “I won’t try to pressure you anymore, Treyjen. You’re right. Even if you did give in… it would never be a happy marriage. I was just… being a silly little girl.” Wyliva placed one hand over Gildira’s. Treyjen noticed how the woman seemed to be pointedly not looking at him anymore. Well, whatever. If his brother’s wife wanted to be angry with him, let her. But Gildira’s apology and promise not to try to force this marriage crap on him anymore did wonders to make him relax. Gildira looked back over at him then, “I just want to know… if you want anything to do with this child? Reyloran and Wyliva… they offered to take it in, once it’s weaned. If… if I….” She couldn’t quite bring herself to say, if she didn’t want it herself.

“I want it,” he said, surprising them all, maybe surprising himself a little too, because suddenly he couldn’t help but think about his own father, and how he wanted to do so much better for his own children, no matter how he came to have them. Just because he didn’t want marriage didn’t mean he wanted to be a shit father. His gaze flitted to Rey, the son Treylok had abandoned when he hadn’t proved useful enough, hadn’t lived up the man’s expectations. And now Gildira was talking about abandoning their child, asking him if he would do the same?

“Treyjen…?” his mother was looking at him with wide eyes, “You… would like to keep this child?”

“It’s mine, isn’t it?” he shot back defensively, “I’m not gonna abandon it.”

Gildira flinched, but didn’t say anything, looking rather at a loss.

Treyjen cleared his throat a bit, “If… if you and Wyliva wouldn’t mind taking care of it, til it’s old enough t’come with me when we sail….” He met his brother’s eyes, hopeful that he would do him this generous favor.

Reyloran nodded without hesitation, “Of course. You and your child will always be welcome in our home.” He looked over at Gildira then, “Depending of course on Gildira, and whatever it is she decides t’do.”

Gildira nodded numbly, pushing to her feet all of a sudden, “I’m… I’m sorry. I just… feel so tired….” Wyliva was on her feet immediately, leading the girl away to rest.

A silence drew out before Treyjen spoke again, “Y’would really take it in? Like your own?”

Reyloran nodded again, “Even if the child isn’t born of the two of us, it will certainly still be family, Treyjen. I didn’t think you’d want it, and I wanted to make sure it was taken care of and Gildira’d be free t’do as she liked.”

“Why wouldn’t I want my own child?” he growled back, defensive again.

Reyloran sighed, “Calm down, little brother. Y’know how y’live. S’not exactly conducive t’raising a child. It’s hard t’imagine y’wanting that responsibility holding y’back.”

He couldn’t deny the truth of that. Responsibility was not something he desired in life. The word meant unpleasant and boring tasks, generally, things better left to someone else so he could do something more interesting. He had a basic understanding of just how much effort caring for a child required. He had helped his mother care for Nalyra when he’d been a boy, after all. He’d been an outside witness to it. She was still young, though she at least didn’t need constant looking after anymore. He leaned forward, elbows resting on his legs as he ran both hands over his face and through his hair. He could already hear his father berating him when he brought the kid out to sea with them, because balancing his work with the constant attention a child would require would be next to impossible. His gaze shifted to his mother then, “Have y’told father?”

Jenara sighed, shook her head, “No. Not yet.” She frowned as she looked at him, “Please… don’t come to blows with him over this.”

Treyjen snorted, “That’s entirely up t’him. I’m not gonna sit back and let him hit me.” It had been some time since his father had last struck him, since he’d decided to fight back, but he could imagine the man raising a hand at this news. You tarnish our reputation, give the entire family a bad name. You’re bad for business, Treyjen, and business is all that matters in the end, isn’t it? he thought to himself since his father wasn’t there to tell him. There was a sudden knot of anxiety in his stomach that was entirely uncharacteristic for him. Would his father finally cast him off for this? Would he be barred from sailing, have to leave his friends, his little sister, and find some other ship that might have him? … And if he took his blows, would he be allowed to stay? Could he stomach it? Was it worth it? He shot a side glance at his mother, “I don’t see why we need t’tell him at all.”

She sighed again, “You know he’ll find out eventually, Treyjen. People talk, and he has ears to hear them.”

Treylok had built up plenty of connections over the turns. He was decently well known, particularly in Tillek. Which made every mistake Treyjen made that much worse. Treylok had spent turns and turns building up a good reputation and his youngest son was doing his best to ruin it every chance he got. Treyjen had a feeling his skills as a trader and a sailor were not going to save him for much longer. His usefulness to his father would soon be outweighed by his ‘bad choices’ and the shame he brought down on the man. This might be the tipping point. If it wasn’t for Nalyra he likely would have jumped ship already, found another to work on, but he couldn’t leave his sister with that man. Shells.

He would have to do something to be allowed to stay, and it was going to be something he didn’t like.

Reyloran frowned, “You’re always welcome here, little brother.”

He looked up, laughed humorlessly, “I appreciate that, Rey.” And he did, but he wasn’t about to join his brother as a fisher. He stood, glanced down at his mother, “Do y’know where he is?”

She stood, “I’ll come with you-”

Treyjen shook his head, “No.” Whatever was going to happen, he didn’t want his mother there for it. Just in case.

She bit her lip as she looked at him, all the worry clear on her face. Her breath hitched, “One of these days, I can’t help feeling you two are going to kill each other.”

Treyjen gave her a lopsided half smile at that, attempting to be reassuring, “Don’t be so dramatic. Do y’know where he is, or not?”

[Zen]

He had to wait for his father to finish up some business, watching people walk by, going about their day, considering his options. It felt almost like being a boy again. Wait here and don’t get into anything. Your behavior reflects on me, so it better reflect only good things. He laughed to himself as he recalled the words his father had said so often when he was too young to help with such ventures but had been brought along to learn. His father had taught him useful things. Keep your eyes and ears open. All the little details most people overlook can be pieced together to tell an entirely different story than the ones people offer willingly. Those details could be used against them, if you knew how to find them.

Treylok exited the establishment, didn’t look at him as he walked past, “Come, we’ll talk on the way. I still have plenty to do today.”

Treyjen followed, “I don't know if this is really a conversation that can be had between business.” He forced his sailor’s accent away. His father hated it. It makes you sound uneducated, simple. Do you know how that affects customers? They devalue your product because they devalue YOU. You’ll lose us marks talking like that.

Treylok glanced back at him, a scowl on his face, “What did you do now?”

Wonderful. This was going to go well. “You know Gildira.”

“That girl that follows you everywhere for some reason only Faranth knows?” his father’s gaze narrowed and he stopped walking to turn to him, “What have you done to her?”

Treyjen had a feeling the man already knew. That dark look was in his father’s eye, the one he had feared as a boy, the one that set him on edge, made his fists clench, ready to fight back now that he wasn’t smaller, weaker. But Treylok wouldn’t strike him here, out in public. So he cut to the point, “She’s carrying my child.”

Treylok cursed and a clenched fist had Treyjen going rigid, even though he knew no blow was coming, not here. His father thrust two fingers against his shoulder and he did his best not to react, which was a lot harder than he’d thought it would be, “And just what do you plan to do about it?”

He knew the answer his father was looking for. It all came back to marriage. He couldn’t give him that answer, even if it would likely solve the entire issue. “Rey and his wife are taking care of her. They’ve offered to take care of the babe as well.”

“So you’re just going to drop your problems on your brother and run away from them? Typical,” the man snarled, “Typical that your problems become your family’s problems while you face no consequence!”

Treyjen clenched his teeth on the argument that wanted to escape his mouth. This was so much more difficult than he’d thought it would be. “I’m not running away.”

“No? Are you taking responsibility for your actions? I don’t think so,” Treylok spat back, “If you were any sort of man you would marry that girl but you’re still an immature, irresponsible little boy that cares about no one but yourself.” Treyjen’s blood was boiling. He felt like his teeth were going to shatter if he bit down any harder. As if his father had any right to lecture him about selfishness! “If you don’t marry that girl, you can stay here when the Lokarra sails,” Treylok snarled, “And good riddance.”

That knot of anxiety in his stomach coiled tighter, “No!” Treylok had turned to leave him there, and didn’t stop at his son’s protest. Nalyra. He hurried after his father, “Please… if there’s… if there’s anything else….” The pleading left a bitter taste on his tongue, but what choice did he have? He had come here prepared to do things he didn’t want to do, but marriage wasn’t one of them.

“What are you going on about?” Treylok spat back, still not looking at him, not slowing his pace.

“Father, please,” the note of desperation finally drew the man’s gaze, “I can’t… I can’t marry her. But I promise, if you let me stay… I’ll do anything. Anything else.”

“Is your word supposed to mean something to me?” Treylok growled, finally stopping to face him again.

“It doesn’t have to! You can leave me ashore whenever you like if I don’t keep it. Please… tell me what I can do,” he felt as though he were going to throw up. He hated this, couldn’t believe he was doing it.

Treylok appeared both shocked and wary, “What game are you playing, Treyjen?”

“I swear, this is no game, father,” he replied, feeling sick all the while. He had to throw himself completely on his father’s mercy, of which he knew the man had very little. “Name your price, I’ll pay it. Anything but marriage.”

Treylok laughed, a bitter, harsh sound, “You act as though marriage is a death sentence, boy.” He considered his son, scrutinizing, and stepped closer, “If you want to continue to be part of this family, you will shape up. No more drunken brawls, and I never want to hear about this happening again. You’ll keep that insolent tongue of yours in your mouth and you’ll show me some proper respect and obedience. Or the next time we stop in Tillek, you’ll be staying when we leave.”

Relief and disgust both warred within Treyjen at his father’s words but he somehow managed to swallow the bile that seemed to be rising in the back of his throat at what he was about to say, choking the words out when he could barely stomach them, “Thank you, father-”

“This is your last chance, boy,” Treylok interrupted him, “Don’t make me regret it. Now get out of my sight. You’ve wasted enough of my time.”

This time when Treylok continued on his way, Treyjen let him go and silently cursed at the way he was shaking from all the barely contained emotions ripping through him that he had not been able to let out during his encounter with his father. He would have rather let the man beat him to a bloody pulp than agree to obey him. The man deserved none of his respect. And yet if he didn’t want to be separated from Nalyra, he had no choice. He couldn’t leave her to Treylok, to allow their father to do as he pleased with her. There would come a day he and his father would be at odds over his sister with no compromise or solution, he knew that… it was just a matter of when. Perhaps his mother was right, perhaps they would kill each other, because he would have to be dead before he’d let Treylok use Nalyra like just another pawn.

~~~

Over the next several months he did keep his word to his father, mostly, and where he pushed his luck he was careful. It never got any easier to silently follow his father’s orders without the usual snark he was used to giving him, and the desire to test the man still rose up now and then, but he managed to control it, for his sister. He figured it was safe enough to play the field outside of Tillek as it was unlikely he would ever see any of those women again after their encounters, as long as he was more discreet about it so no word got back to his father. The most difficult thing was keeping out of any tavern brawls. He rather enjoyed a good fistfight, and excusing himself from his friends’ company before one could start was a major buzzkill.

But being in Tillek was the worst. He had to play nice in Tillek, be on his best behavior, because any wrong move getting back to his father could mean the end of their agreement. There was already a stain on his father’s reputation in Tillek because of him, the disdain of Gildira’s family and those closest to them because of what he had done and what he refused to do. He did his best to stay out of his father’s way in Tillek, feeling like some sort of criminal doing little more than hiding out at home or at his brother Rey’s. He even went out fishing with his brother rather than remain in Tillek and risk something happening. He didn’t give a shell what anyone thought of him, but confrontation over the matter was a real possibility and even if he didn’t start it, he knew his father would blame him for anything that happened. He checked in with Gildira, briefly, but things were incredibly strained and unpleasant between them and he never remained in her company for long, for both their sakes. She never tried to bring up marriage with him again, but he knew she was still upset over it.

And then came the day the Lokarra returned to Tillek and Treyjen was told he had a son. They arrived several weeks after the boy’s birth and Treyjen went to Reyloran’s home feeling uncharacteristically apprehensive. He had a son. Gildira was asleep while Wyliva watched over the boy so she could rest. The woman smiled over at him as he approached where she was holding his son in her arms. “She named him Gildrey,” Wyliva told him softly.

Treyjen peered at the little bundle, feeling all sorts of things he’d never felt before, and that familiar protectiveness he remembered feeling about Nalyra when he’d first seen her in their mother’s arms, tiny and helpless. Wyliva shifted slightly to offer the babe to him and he hesitated for a moment. He’d never held a baby before, not since he’d been a boy, holding Nalyra carefully in his lap while his mother made sure he supported her head properly. “I don’t….”

“Oh, here, it isn’t hard. And babies aren’t as fragile as they look,” Wyliva murmured with some amusement in her tone, settling Gildrey in his father arms, “Honestly, Rey was the same way with Wyloran.”

So small, so helpless, so light in his arms. Gildrey squirmed a bit and Treyjen nearly shoved the boy back at Wyliva, but he settled after a short moment with the softest sigh, asleep. “Gildrey, you said?” Treyjen couldn’t take his eyes off his son’s tiny face.

“Mm,” Wyliva agreed softly.

He had no idea how Gildira could still be considering leaving him. But then he didn’t know, maybe she had changed her mind now that he was here. He held his son to his chest and wondered how any father could treat their children as Treylok had. Looking at Gildrey, he silently promised his son that he would never have to question whether his father wanted him, loved him. He would be everything that Treylok was not.