A Matter Of Perspective [Muze/Fehl]

[Zen]

Nalyra

The storm had battered them handily and Nalyra counted them all lucky no one had been lost overboard considering some of the waves that had washed over the deck. Nalyra found such storms to be thrilling, a challenge to navigate through. It was a complete rush to face them head on and come out the other side victorious, even if she had been completely soaked through. Peeling the tight, wet clothing off after the worst had passed had been a bit of a challenge, fortunately she’d had some help. There was nothing quite like riding the adrenaline high with a nice romp in the furs. It was a decent way to warm up, too. The next day had dawned dreary, gray, with a steady rain, but at least the wind wasn’t so furious. Still, it made figuring out just where the storm had taken them next to impossible. It wasn’t until the next day that the clouds finally began to clear and that night found Nalyra out on the quarterdeck with a map stretched out and a sextant in her hand as she measured the stars and compared the coordinates she came up with to the coordinates of the last location that she’d known where they were.

She couldn't wait until she could let Valder handle the daily coordinate checks. The task was so tedious to perform every day and there were other things she would much rather be doing with her nights. The man was still a bit skittish, though, which didn’t inspire enough trust to allow him to dictate their course. She didn’t think it would be much longer before most of the Bright Wing’s original crew had properly earned their places, but there was still a little work to be done. So far there’d only been the one traitor, but that didn’t mean another wasn’t biding their time. Froskel’s betrayal had rather set the entire rest of the crew back a little as it brought back doubts that had begun to fade. There was always one, it seemed, when they took in too many new recruits at once. It made them bolder.

Setting the sextant down, she rubbed at her eyes and turned around to lean back against the table, staring out over the black water that stretched on endlessly in all directions, becoming one with the sky where the sea met the horizon. If only it was endless… how exciting would it be to sail off the edge of the world and into the stars? To explore the unknown would be a grand adventure, one she would happily embark on if it were only possible. But there was no edge of the world, only an infinite loop, and if she thought about it too much it made her feel like a runnerbeast on a track, racing in pointless circles. The unknown was out of reach and the thought was frustrating, as the only things available to her bored her far too easily. There were bursts of excitement, like the storm of two days past, or the thrill of the hunt when it came to chasing down a ship and taking her for themselves. Not that she got to participate as much in that anymore, and that was further irksome. The Storm’s Eye had all the real fun while the Bright Wing was left with the scraps. It only served to make her wonder again if Treyjen had influenced the crew somehow in choosing her as captain. She knew he didn’t like her participating in the fighting.

She gave a toss of her head to shake free some locks of hair that had blown into her face then reached up to run her fingers through it, smoothing her hair back as she pushed off from the table and turned back around, eyeing the map. The storm had done quite a number on them, pushing them farther north toward the Fortian Peninsula. It was anyone’s guess where the other two ships ended up. She would know in the morning when flits went out carrying the coordinates of their new locations. At least they were on their way back to Mavros so it didn’t matter too much that they might be scattered. It was unlikely they’d be doing anymore plundering this venture unless a prime target happened to run across their path. Otherwise the hunt was over until they took their leave of Mavros again. Such a shame. Absently, she traced a finger along the coastline of the northern continent. They could just as well spend a few days more in the area and chase down a Fortian trading vessel on its way to the south. Raw healing herbs came up from Southern and some of it went back down as fully processed medicine after the Healer Hall at Fort got their hands on it. She tapped a finger near Fort thoughtfully, annoyed that it wasn’t her decision.

tovaana

[tovaana]

Fehloax;

The thrill of the storm didn’t reach his heart as it would other sailors – neither in excitement or terror. He’d learned early on, like with other things, that if you disconnected from potential results of an event, then you could be more productive and more effective. He did sometimes marvel at the strength of a storm, and at the beauty and chaos it left in its wake – it was something to respect, or you could get swallowed within in it. Somewhere deep within his barren chest he was glad no one had died – and he reasoned because it would have been a waste of life, even if he were in denial of feelings he had long pushed down and under barriers.

He’d spent most of his time securing cargo during the storm, but had made trips above to check the status of the storm and what more he could do to help. It’d been cold, wet, and tiresome, and he’d slept well that night. Yet, tonight one of the men was snoring and allowed his mind to think about his ship and the cargo. Already it was easy to forget that the cargo they carried wasn’t traded fairly like it had been before the pirates, that blood had paid for the goods aboard… or maybe the fact that it had cost so much more, made Fehloax appreciate the cargo so much more, wanting to protect it from getting ruined after the high cost.

Fehl sighed. The snoring wasn’t going to stop and neither were his thoughts. Perhaps he could take someone’s night shift on deck, though he wasn’t sure they’d allow one of the new recruits to be wandering around at night, but there was only one way to find out. With practiced movements he swung out of his cot and tugged on his boots. He left his lighter shirt on – it was getting muggy with all the bodies sleeping, and deemed that the cold ocean breeze would do him good. Still, he grabbed a thicker shirt for after he’d cooled off.

Luckily his excuse of needing a breath of fresh air was enough excuse for the pirate he passed on the way above. It hadn’t been a lie – and he couldn’t help but take a deep appreciative breath of the salty air as he surfaced, like a whale out of the ocean. It had been darker below deck too, with nothing like the stars to light the dim enclosure. He went immediately to the side of the deck and glanced down to the dark boat’s body that slid through salty water that lapped eagerly at her side. Then his eyes moved up and out at the ocean, taking a moment to center himself and empty his thoughts about work. It was helpful, and yet, not helpful, as he turned to lean his back on the railing to notice that the sensuous silhouette of his Captain was up at her post. Helpful, because there was nothing like a woman to empty his thoughts – and yet, she was Captain, and had everything to do with work.

Usually he didn’t approach women he was interested in, he liked them to come to him – it was that sense of security that he knew that they wanted him. No sense in chasing something that didn’t like you back, and a waste of his time. Nalyra was different, mostly because she was his Captain – and while he desired her as he had desired others, she was also the key to his security in his home. Then there was the strange mix of her being his Captain and being a woman, and he had to admit that there was something intriguing there that he wanted to discover, but then she was his Captain… It was an irritating thing, to want something he probably couldn’t have, especially to himself. Yet, if she’d been something he could have all to himself, he probably wouldn’t want to keep her. The conundrum.

And so he found his boots treading softly on the deck toward her, trying to ignore feelings as he spotted her running her fingers through her hair. His luck seemed to be consistent, as there was no one between him and her – though there were others around, and he was sure there was a pair of eyes watching him like a hawk.

“Capt’n.” He said in his soft tones, hoping to draw her attention if she hadn’t already noticed him approaching – no need to surprise her. It wasn’t until he was closer that he realized what he was doing, as if his feet and desires had drawn him toward her without logical reasoning. Maybe to get closer, to earn her trust – and earn more, but that was ridiculous and not near enough reason to approach the short and fiery Captain. He glanced up at the stars and briefly down at her maps. It was one of the few things that he didn’t know much about… a little bit about the stars and how they were used, but not nearly enough knowledge to navigate. “How far off are we?” He asked gently, his eyes searching her face, realizing that his words held a bit more meaning than the obvious.

[Zen]

Nalyra

Treyjen chose their prey. He had a rather uncanny ability to pick the most worthwhile targets. Nalyra was sure it had something to do with his knowledge as a trader, but she had always been far less interested in those lessons. She had simply loved sailing, traveling, exploring. Treyjen’s knowledge on such subjects, therefore, quite surpassed her own, not to mention how her own study of the subject had been more limited both by time and because she was female. Her mother had taught her, not her father, and if anything good was ever to be said about that tunnelsnake of a man, he had a real talent as a trader. There was a reason he’d built up so many connections, that he had a good reputation in the port Holds, that his name carried weight… which was why anything Treyjen had done to sully his name had been met with such violent discipline. Their father had cared far more for his reputation than his family. Her finger traced around the Fortian peninsula, along the coast to Tillek as she thought of her father.

How sweet would it be to capture the Lokarra for their own? She wasn’t sure whether she would rather see Treyjen slit their father’s throat or do it herself. Then again, there was no reason to give him such a quick death, was there? It wouldn’t be difficult to track down their father’s ship. His course about the seas of Pern was fairly regular, or at least it had been when they’d left. They could just lie in wait along the normal route he always took out of Tillek for a couple sevendays around when he normally left. It would be an easy ambush. She didn’t understand why Treyjen had never done it. On the contrary, he had always steered them well clear of Tillek. She made a soft, displeased sound. Everything was Treyjen’s decision… but she was a captain now. That had to mean something. The Bright Wing might not be as fast as the Storm’s Eye but she could keep pace easily enough with most ships. Perhaps she ought to pick her own prey for once.

“Capt’n.”

It was soft, and yet in the still, quiet night, it seemed remarkably loud somehow, and drew her from her contemplation. Amber eyes flicked toward the approaching form of Fehloax as she straightened from her bent position over the map. She was glad for the night, it was easier to ignore how attractive he was in the dark. Still, his presence brought a flicker of irritation, as she was ever forced to deny herself what she really wanted with him, and she was not used to denying herself anything she wanted. She was a pirate and she took what she pleased… she was quite determined to take him too, soon enough, but she was still uncertain. He had impressed her when he’d gone through with killing that traitor, and it had earned him a bit more trust from the rest of the crew as well, which had been the whole point. With any other man, perhaps it would have been enough, but he remained elusive, the deeper parts of him, his true feelings and motivations and loyalties. She could rarely get a good read on him and after living and working together for several months, it was ridiculously frustrating.

She did know one thing about him for sure, and that was that he wanted her, but that was hardly surprising. Still, it was good to know he felt desire as much as any other man. It was a start, something that made him at least a little less mystifying. He was still a man. She glanced down to where she’d figured they had ended up when he asked his question, “Far enough to present an opportunity….” Absently, her finger circled the general area they now resided, “We are, I believe, about midway between Ista and Southern Boll.” She turned a scrutinizing sort of look back at Fehloax, falling silent for a moment as she considered letting him in on her current thought process. At first it seemed stupid to seek the opinion of a man she barely knew over one of the many men she’d lived with for turns now, but then again, his opinion would be untainted by loyalty to her brother. Fehloax had only had a chance to interact with Treyjen on a handful of occasions, and just because he’d had the chance didn’t mean he had taken it. No, she was well and truly his captain, her brother only some distant figure.

There were a few other men spread out over the main deck, but it was just the two of them up on the quarterdeck. She shifted, leaned back against the table where her maps and tools and glows were laid out so she might better see him, slipping almost unconsciously into a pose that accentuated her curves. “We never sail any farther north than this into Big Bay. The waters are incredibly populated… which makes it harder to capture a target without some other ship happening upon us either in the middle of taking our prize or in sorting out just what we’ve obtained after. Yet the amount of trade that happens in Big Bay alone means that the decision to stay away from it costs us many choice prizes. Fortian trade in particular is high volume and high quality. My brother trends toward caution when it comes to choosing our prey, but I find myself more inclined to risk…. I think it would be well worth pushing a bit farther north from here and taking one final ship before we head on to Mavros.”

She let the idea simmer for a moment, watching him, curious if he would dare to challenge or question the possibility. He had seemed submissive enough so far, but she wanted to know his true thoughts on the matter, not just what she wanted to hear. She wanted a glimpse into that head of his. He didn’t seem like a man to take risks, and yet disagreeing with her was a risk for him as well. A teasing sort of smile pulled at her lips, “What would you do? Follow the fleet, or seek a prize of your own? Is there merit in the risk or is the possible cost too high?” She stepped closer to him, a scant few inches between her body and his as she tilted her head up at him, ghosting her fingers lightly up his chest as her voice took on a lower, more seductive tone, “Would you reach out and take the opportunity before you….” She let her fingers linger briefly, softly, at his jaw before pulling her hand away, taking a step back to lean against the table again, “Or let it slip through your fingers?”

She couldn’t help but tease him, for all that his very presence was like a tease to her, taunting her with something she wanted but should not yet have. Shouldn’t, but recklessness was in her nature, and the double meaning in her words was rather obvious. There was an opportunity for him too, here and now, if he was bold enough to reach out and take it. From all she’d seen of him thus far, however, she didn’t think he had it in him. Not yet, at least. Not when his place in the crew hadn’t quite been solidified. If he misjudged her meaning, got too bold now, it just might risk any trust he’d already gained. Such a dilemma. And such a fun game. Part of her rather wanted to be surprised, but she doubted she would be, and there was satisfaction in predicting his actions correctly as well. It made it easier to trust him if he could be predicted, easier to let her guard down around him if she could know what to expect. Nalyra was constantly on the cusp of throwing caution to the wind, however. All she needed was one right move on his part and the temptation might very well be too much to resist. Her fingers tapped impatiently along the edge of the table as she waited, expectant, to see just what his answer would be.

tovaana

[tovaana]

Fehloax;

Opportunity? His eyes glanced curiously at the map – he was all for new opportunities – it was what had driven him from working with runner beasts to the sea. Though, as she clarified their position on the map, it wasn’t clear to him what opportunity she was implying. His hands went behind his back, holding himself almost like a soldier (but more relaxed), paying attention to her now, quietly, as he waited for her to clarify more. He found that one didn’t need to ask questions to get answers, not always. Especially if the person was already interested in the subject at hand – as Nalyra was about the mentioned opportunity. Besides, the way she was looking at him had him thinking she had something in mind anyways.

As she finally continued on, he found himself soaking up the information and was already coming up with the pros and cons of trade in the area she was commenting on, adding his own questions and thoughts in the categories. The greedy part of him agreed that it might be worth the risk, yet there was also the risk itself – and Fehloax valued his life. His dark honey gaze studied her, sensing the question and challenge she was about to pose to him, but didn’t feel the dread of it until she voiced it. His face was contemplative and still, but he felt his insides chill. But the cold went away as she approached him and he felt his arms relax from their position behind his back, his hands limp at his side. All he had to do was reach and grab her and take the opportunity, but he swallowed and controlled himself, trying to keep his thoughts as clear as he could while she neared him, the details in her face illuminated by starlight. Her light touch bringing warmth everywhere and making it sharding difficult to focus…

And then she was out of reach, making a point about their relationship and business as a pirate at the same time.

If she hadn’t been captain, then he would have taken that opportunity. If she didn’t have a knife somewhere on her person, he’d be even more inclined to just take what he wanted, as he usually did when it came to women, but Nalyra was a whole different game. Her position not only determined his future, but also his life. He liked feisty women, but she was a whole new level… as he hadn’t known many pirates, especially women. He tried to convince himself that he could find another pirate woman to satisfy the need she created in him. However, he couldn’t imagine there being anyone like Nalyra, and anyways- he liked the challenge she presented, even if it sparked a certain amount of fear in his belly.

As she stepped away he felt his mind clear a little, but was coupled with his disappointment. He let himself smile, just a little, with his lips. Would he use his words to simply please her? Or speak his mind? He did not like lying… and he’d put himself in this situation, no matter how he wanted to blame his feet and feelings.

“Pirates seem accustomed to risk.” He commented thoughtfully. Instead of walking toward her like he wanted, he purposefully took a step toward her maps and looked at the spot she’d been circling. He fingered the spot as gently as she had touched him, thinking of the way she had touched him. Just because he didn’t like lying, didn’t mean he would admit to foolish things – like admitting he was no pirate… or at least, his soul still resisted the role, despite his new reality.

“I admit I see the profitability of risk…” He mused, turning back to Nalyra and looking her over with little shame. “One gains little with little risk.” He met her eyes and smiled, only a little more than he had before. Though he was sure it was nerves that spurred the smile, as calm as he seemed. “Too much risk or recklessness and you lose… everything.” His smile faltered a little. “So…” The word quiet as he shifted, turning away from Nalyra as he blinked at the map, as if it held the answer to her question. “In our current situation, I’d probably pass.” Even as he said it, he felt like he’d lose her. “Until I could come back with a plan. Possibly scouting the waters and spending months tracking ships and their paths… and practicing a more efficient way of overtaking a ship so it was quick.” He spoke, almost forgetting that the captain was there, and that he was musing aloud because it had been she who had spurred his thoughts. “In and out, choosing a target on the outskirts… is there a way to block a ship – so all three ships could converge on a target at once? Maybe harpoon it, to secure it until the slower ships caught up. Then…if there were still no other ships on the horizon, all three could board at once.” He spoke, only toward the end when he’d asked the question more aware of Nalyra’s presence – remembering she was there. It was the most he’d spoken in front of her… and probably more than she had wanted to hear. While he had spoken in his soft clear voice, seemingly unbothered, he blamed his nerves for the way he had kept talking. So he closed his mouth, but didn’t look back at Nalyra – he didn’t need her distracting him further with her eyes and hips, not yet.

Zen

[Zen]

Nalyra

She watched him, but between the dark and the way he seemed to keep all his thoughts and feelings locked up so tightly, she could discern little, not from his body language or anything in his face. He was rarely anything but carefully neutral. The most emotion she’d seen out of him was when she’d tasked him with killing the traitor, and even that was… muted. His first words did not seem to warrant a reply, and hardly seemed to indicate what he might be thinking one way or the other more than it was just a statement of fact. And when he stepped forward it wasn’t toward her, but the maps. Her fingers drummed a little faster in annoyance. He was so frustrating.

After a moment he turned to look at her again, and the drumming of her fingers paused briefly because the way he looked her over was almost promising. Almost. As he continued it felt like he was teasing her, and she didn’t appreciate it at all. “Tch,” she made a displeased noise as he turned away from her, and his conversation turned more clearly to the opportunity of Big Bay, rather than the opportunity he had with her. She watched him through narrowed eyes as he spoke, taking in his thoughts on the matter even as annoyed as she was about his caution. It was probably for the best, at least where the two of them were concerned, but she didn’t have to like it. And his caution over the opportunity in Big Bay only had her sighing lightly. She would have liked to have seen a little more boldness from him, at least on one count or the other. Still, she supposed there was a little bit in disagreeing with her. Not that she’d had a particularly firm stance on venturing farther north.

She eyed him as he lapsed into silence, “You ought to be careful that your fear of death doesn’t prevent you from living, Fehloax.” It wasn’t like he’d ever stated outright to her that he was afraid to die, but it was a common fear, and there didn’t seem to be any other reason for him to have joined the crew. He hadn’t had the courage of conviction to die for the cause of his former crew or for some lofty sense of superior morality and he obviously hadn’t joined because the life of a pirate had actually appealed to him. Neither did it seem like he’d joined because he harbored any plots of vengeance, or why would he have gone through with killing the traitor? Like most new recruits, she was quite certain he had only joined because the alternative was death, and he would rather be held captive to serve the people who had killed his former crew and taken his freedom away from him than risk death.

Nalyra was not afraid of death. Though she would never admit it to anyone, she was far more afraid of being controlled. A life without freedom wasn’t a life she deemed worth living. Had she been in Fehloax’s place, only death would have stopped her from fighting for her freedom. She would never be someone’s captive. If the last act she performed as a free woman was to slit her own throat, so be it. She tossed her wind wild hair back and left those thoughts behind, returning to the matter at hand for now, as it seemed Fehloax was going to pass on his opportunity. “I can understand where your musings are coming from, but Treyjen would never go for it and I’d never take the Sea Dragon along, she’d be far too slow and vulnerable in Big Bay. If we want a taste of the opportunity in the Bay, it will be my ship and my crew alone who take the risk,” she explained, though didn’t fully explain that Treyjen would never allow it if he knew. If she did go through with the idea, he would be absolutely livid when he found out. And that was why she was considering the opportunity now. They might never have a better chance. And maybe she was eager to see just how she would do on her own, choosing her own target, executing her own chase and boarding plan, not just following her brother’s strategy. But Fehloax didn’t need to know that detail.

She hopped up onto the table and leaned back on her hands, obscuring some of the map with her body, “But maybe it’s too early for that. I wouldn’t want you boys getting too scared on me, being that I’m a new made captain and all. I suppose you’d all be too afraid to take too much of a risk with me.” There was a slight mocking tone to her voice, and she smirked a little, teasing him for being too afraid to take the opportunity she’d given him. She did wonder about it though. She wasn’t sure the crew would agree to go along with the idea. Most of them would want to get Treyjen’s thoughts and she already knew what her brother would say. It probably was too early. She didn’t have enough crew loyal to her over Treyjen to pull it off. One day, though… and Fehloax would be just the start.

tovaana

[tovaana]

Fehloax;

“I don’t fear death.” He countered, not enjoying how she presumed to know him at all. And he liked to think he didn’t fear death, he just enjoyed the thought of living far more agreeable to him. He had faced death so often recently, it seemed an absurd thing to say, and he knew it did. “I never said I did. I’d rather like to think I’m invested in my life and its future.” Which was worth more than other men, he was sure.

The wave of her hair didn’t send any new scent other than the salty breeze, but he liked to imagine it had. If he couldn’t have her in reality, he could have her in his mind. The man looked up with his dark brown gaze that probably looked more black in the current lighting, as she went on about the plan she had presented. Her logical words seemed to have less passion in them, land he wondered if she was disappointed in his answer. He wanted to make her happy, for to gain her favor and that of the crew – so he could possibly live a ‘normal’ life again, even if it was one of a pirate… He wanted to make her happy for other reasons too, and it was hard to sort through his two distinct desires. To between with it all, it wasn’t fair – who’d ever thought of a woman Captain? It was completely maddening.

So he went back to studying the map…of which she then covered partially and he rolled his eyes a little before looking up at her. And again, she went on mocking, or teasing, but it felt like mocking. What was even more maddening was her proximity again, not very close – but when she was standing and he was standing, she was short enough to alleviate some of that tension… but that was not the case now.

All he had to do, so all he did, was lean smoothly and quickly in – with very little warning, and ignored all the ringing bells in his mind that told him what a terrible idea this was, and kissed her ((if she let him)). One of his hands had gone up to her shoulder to bring her in closer ((if she let him)) and toward the end of the kiss was playing with the pendant around her neck. All the warning bells had gone silent, everything else in his brain and otherwise wanted more, but he always wanted more, though taking what he wanted on deck didn’t seem prudent…

“Raiding ships, pillaging…I’ll do whatever you ask of me…” And he dropped the pendant, leaning away to put some space between them, a small smile at the corner of his lips. “Capt’n.”