Post by kevna on Apr 30, 2020 17:18:45 GMT -5
Riasu lay on her cot, trying to sleep, though she tossed and turned. The voices were loud and unfamiliar. Her emotions were heightened, and it made her control sloppy. She placed her pillow over her head, groaning, trying to dampen the sound. It did nothing for her. Obviously. She clenched her jaw and threw the pillow off.
“Oh shells.”
The dark-skinned woman sat up and moved to swing her legs down but stopped herself. She needed sleep. She thought about waking Jarath, he could always talk her into sleep. He and Breeanth, her mother’s green, had been major influencers in helping Riasu learn to control her ability. Focusing on one voice out of the many was key. Still, she didn’t have the heart to wake the beast, it wasn’t his fault she couldn’t sleep.
Instead she closed her eyes, sifting through the voices that bombarded hers until she found a most chatty female voice. It sounded much like Breeanth’s, though obviously younger and much more rambunctious. The female voice, a green she guessed, was gossiping about the latest news, something about the weyrwoman, though Riasu gathered she was coming in late to the conversation. It didn’t help she could only hear one side of it.
She didn’t bother to focus on the words, instead just allowed the constant chatter to lull her into slumber. Though the slumber wasn’t deep, nor restful:
----
She wore her riding leathers, mostly because she liked the way he looked at her when she wore them, but also because she hoped to convince D’min and Solith to take an outing with her. Maybe somewhere warmer, like Southern. He would be in a good mood she supposed, as he would be coming in from threadfighting training for the newest weyrlings. Riasu waited for him in his weyr, she had thought to bring a book because she knew how much he liked to correct and lecture when it came to threadfighting.
I don’t like it. I don’t like this at all.
Solith’s voice reached her mind unheedingly, and Riasu was surprised by the anger behind it.
What’s wrong, dear beast? She asked concerned, but the brown didn’t respond. The quiet was eerie.
She is waiting in our weyr.
Her eyebrows folded in, and she closed the book just as D’min walked in. Since when did D’min need a warning of her presence? He did not look happy. “What’s wrong, my love?” Riasu set aside the book, standing and going to the weyrleader, concern apparent in her voice. She quickly approached the taller man, and threaded her arms around his waist, kissing his chin. He didn’t respond. At least not the way she expected. He took her shoulders and pushed her away, turning to face away from her. She tried to move so she could see his face, but he kept his back firmly to her.
Something was not right. Not right at all. “D’min?” She prodded, and he set his shoulders.
“What are we doing?” His voice was angry, and Riasu blinked. “What do you mean?” She asked, her voice guarded. She stepped away from him but did not dare turn her back on him. She would not be so vulnerable.
“I mean, what am I kidding? You’re a child. What am I doing? You don’t even have a dragon for Faranth’s sake.”
Riasu raised her eyebrows, her eyes widening. He was lashing out, but why? “I am no child; I think I’ve already proved that to you. Multiple times. And I will have a dragon. Is this about me not standing for the last hatching? There wasn’t a gold egg, I thought we decided to wait?”
“You decided you mean.” He turned and pointed at her accusingly. This was an old argument, but they had settled it almost a turn ago.
“I am my own woman, I thought you appreciated that.” She lifted her chin, brows furrowing, “and we both ended up agreeing. Where is this coming from?” Her voice raised on its own accord, and she blinked back tears. She would not show him weakness.
“I’m just sick and tired of you not listening to me. You think you know what’s best, but you don’t. I’m sick and tired of you.”
“You weren’t so tired of me last night.”
He didn’t answer, just clenched his jaw, looking at her. Her head tilted, confusion filling the void. She was afraid of where this was heading… “This isn’t about me, is it?” It was his turn to blink, and his eyes widened. His whole body stiffened.
“What do you mean, of course it is.”
“No, I don’t think so.” She shook her head; she couldn’t believe it How could she be so deadglow? “This isn’t about me, nor the fact I don’t have a dragon yet. This is about you.” Now it was her turn to point accusingly at him, and she took a few steps forward, fuming. “What’s her name, D’min? Which flitter-brained woman did you knock up? Afraid she’ll come out and tell me?” She spat at him, “Thought you’d just end it, and save the embarrassment of a public encounter when I found out?” Riasu clenched her hands.
“I-I..” He was searching for words, as if he was looking for any other excuse. “I didn’t cheat, Ri, I wouldn’t.” He almost sounded convincing.
“Oh really?” She chuckled, rolling her eyes. “How flitter-brained do you think I am?”
D’min rubbed his face. “I…”
“Don’t. Don’t even. If there is one thing you’ve proved, it’s that I’m a fool for loving you.” A tear slipped out, uncontrolled, and she angrily wiped it away.
She turned to stalk out, but she stopped, and looked over her shoulder. “Was it… Is it Arecie?” She had wondered...He didn’t answer, just looked at the ceiling of his weyr. She looked away, more tears were coming, and they burned. “You are going to regret this, D’min. I’ll show you.”
The tall woman marched out, slamming the door behind her.
His voice crept in, quiet, mournful. “He is sorry. I will miss you.” She lost it, sobbing as she ran to anywhere but there.
----
She gasped, sitting up suddenly, her eyes full of liquid and her throat thick. “Shard it.” She whispered, Solith’s apology resounding in her ears, a ghost of a whisper against the bombardment of unfamiliar voices re-entering her head. For a time she stared at her knees, eyes closed, trying to focus. Then she shook her hair out, stood, and moved to the door of the candidate’s section. She needed to walk it off. She needed to walk them off.
The woman decided the best way would be to drown them out. She took a breath, and let down her mental barricade that saved her from the brunt of the voices, and allowed the voices to do just that. Drown them out. She started running, glad she had thought to sleep in exercise worthy clothes, and embraced the voices, letting them numb her.
